Thursday, March 19, 2009

I am bursting

I am bursting at the seams with these ideas. I have to completely settle myself and start the process of mapping....I want to say soul mapping. I am one of those individuals who has a very hard time taking the baby steps that are needed becasue I get overwhelmed. Goals overwhelm me. Dates, deadlines, commitment, I get over excited. Its not nervous but it is nervous energy and without proper channeling it is almost always lost in outer space. But maybe not. I think that some energy does come find you again. Maybe when you are more able to handle what it has to bring. I do not know. I just know that if I can sit with my ideas, make room for my ideas, create the space to move them forward, actually commit (AHHHAH I said the word) and then contiue to follow through without feeling the overwhelming alarming pressures of a finished product. I will be so at peace. I have felt my heart scream what it must do. I have felt my soul be called to who it must work with and what it must accomplish....I have no clue how to do it, when it will happen, or what it will end up as. And this is where I am having a hard time letting go. Let me be honest. The hardest part is the letting go and the opening of the soul to receive. May I do just this.....at least I feel better for putting all my energy in these words.

3 comments:

  1. You are at the right place, though. You have the ideas and the dreams. The goals just have to follow suit. Let the goals take on the physical form of the dreams. Take each part one step at a time. Then, as you accomplish each part, let that be your instant gratification. It doesn't have to be the end result that brings you the satisfaction. Just the small, simple pieces can be rewarding and exciting because they are leading you to the end!! I'm so proud of you!!!

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  2. Reading this made me wonder if you weren't wondering through my brain the other day. As always we are connected in that sense of dreaming and mentally creating but it seems so hard for us to translate it into the physical world and actually making the commitment (such a scary word when it comes to art) to give it life. I hope that you can find the doorway to let those ideas flow into the real world and I will remember this as I attempt to bring my little brain child into the world as well.

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