Thursday, March 19, 2009
I am bursting
I am bursting at the seams with these ideas. I have to completely settle myself and start the process of mapping....I want to say soul mapping. I am one of those individuals who has a very hard time taking the baby steps that are needed becasue I get overwhelmed. Goals overwhelm me. Dates, deadlines, commitment, I get over excited. Its not nervous but it is nervous energy and without proper channeling it is almost always lost in outer space. But maybe not. I think that some energy does come find you again. Maybe when you are more able to handle what it has to bring. I do not know. I just know that if I can sit with my ideas, make room for my ideas, create the space to move them forward, actually commit (AHHHAH I said the word) and then contiue to follow through without feeling the overwhelming alarming pressures of a finished product. I will be so at peace. I have felt my heart scream what it must do. I have felt my soul be called to who it must work with and what it must accomplish....I have no clue how to do it, when it will happen, or what it will end up as. And this is where I am having a hard time letting go. Let me be honest. The hardest part is the letting go and the opening of the soul to receive. May I do just this.....at least I feel better for putting all my energy in these words.